June 4, 2005
Practice dropping out of destiny. It makes everything smoother...
Corky: Silence, and life out there. I guess life out there is like the life a raccoon. It's a struggle. You've got to live in it but you can still be silent in it. You can walk in it silently and do life and everything, and the more silent you are in it the better. It's really interesting, I have a lot of people come to the Oracle board and most of them come there to make a statement about something. And when I don't let them make a statement, they pretend to ask a question. And then some of them come there to ask questions, but there are very, very, very, few people that will come to the board and really ask an honest question. Have you noticed Bernie? Why?
Bernie: Because they are not interested in asking questions, they are interested in making a statement.
Corky: Do you think that it is possible to be silent, for most people to be silent, and make a statement? It's impossible to make a statement. You can talk, and you can discuss out of the nothingness, but you are not making a statement, you are discussing it. It's a presentation. On the god board or the oracle board those guys make statements don't they? To be able to walk in silence is called the walking meditation. Anybody ever hear of the walking meditation? Al what's the walking meditation?
Al M: It's the meditation that you do all day.
Corky: Is it one that you learn here? Do you think everybody believes that they know how to meditate? The people that learn how to meditate, do they believe they already know how to meditate?
Al M: Yeah, they probably do.
Corky: Okay, do you think that they really do?
Al M: Probably not.
Corky: Why? Because they have a predisposed idea of what meditation is. Wouldn't you say? So even though you teach them how to do it, they won't do it. Because they have a predisposed idea already of what it is.
Bernie: They have a predisposed idea, and they will hold on to their thoughts.
Corky: It's really simple, because they want to argue about it right? They don't want to learn a meditation. Because they already know the "right" way. They are in the "right" way. They are on the "right" path. And they say that there is, to really be honest with you, there is only one path. I'm just being honest. There is only one path. But everybody believes there are lots of paths, and that everybody has their own path. But in reality there is one path. It's like a thread. It runs through Isha Schwaller's book, it runs through Osho's book, it's in the book of everything. It's in every book. It says the exact same thing. It says those very, very, very simple things. It is a silent surrender. That is all it is. I think Osho says it. It was in the cave story, a silent surrender. And the longer you can be in the silence... it was really interesting. I got a really great meditation in today and I needed it because I felt that people have been trying to make me feel responsible for their accidents. Like I said to Steve, whenever you go any place with me, you always have an accident! You get thrown in jail, or you lose your tooth, and I wasn't even in the vicinity when you did it!! I was at least 100 yards up the street, wasn't I?
Ron: You need to watch out who you hang out with Steve.
Steve:That's what my parents told me.
Corky: And Steve said that it was my fault; that I gave him too much to drink. I remember when I gave him too much to drink, I put him by his car and he got sick. And I sent him home in a taxi. But he didn't get sick last night, he just got hurt is all. Does that happen to you at other times, Steve? You go other places and bad things happen to you other than here?
Steve:My friends say I'm always spoiling the fun because I'm always getting hurt.
Corky: That's fine then. It's not my fault?
Steve:No. I was just giving you a hard time. Showing people how easy it is to blame it on somebody else. I know it's my fault.
Corky: Okay. Were you thinking when that happened? You were thinking something.
Steve:Oh no! I wasn't thinking at all.
Corky: Let me tell you what he was thinking. I'll tell you exactly what he was thinking, and you tell me if I'm correct Steve. Okay? He was thinking, if I can get this girl on my back, I might be able to get her in my bed. Wasn't he thinking that?
Bernie: I think he was entertaining something at some point like that. Yes.
Corky: Wasn't he thinking that? And so in that having that girl on his back, he didn't care. He thought it was a female object on his back. He didn't care what it was. And so he thought he would start to perform with it.
Ron: Got a little frisky.
Corky: And he discovered that it was a heavy load.
Bernie: Especially when he lifted that leg!
Corky: It was like a dog pissing on a fire hydrant. He had his hands back there, holding on to her, checkin' it out. He found out it was female and he said "Oh boy, it's time to lift my leg and pee on the fire hydrant." Look what it did to him. Anyway, Chris does the same thing. Except he does it in a different way, he does it in an elevator.
Chris: I abstained from that. I was made the offer in an elevator, but I did not do it.
Corky: Yeah, but you looked.
Chris: It never happened.
Corky: You looked. It happened. In your mind.
Chris: In my mind? Oh of course, everything happens in my mind.
Corky: That's all I'm saying. It happened. You looked. You know what is really funny? I heard a thing on Saturday Night Live, or one of those shows, and I was thinking about Steve when they said it. They said if you go into a public place and you are a man interested in a woman, if she looks at you once she's not interested, but if she looks twice then she's interested and so at that point, you should become interested. At that point, I wondered to myself if Steve does that or if he just plays the game backwards, and that's why he has the accidents.
And I was thinking about Chris, and I was thinking Chris looks in the elevator and they're not even looking, they are showing. They're not even looking, they are showing. They are not even looking, they are showing. They are not interested in you. They are interested in showing for some reason. So that ought to be a clue to avoid it. Because it is a statement rather than a question. And I don't know if you want to get something on your back that has a statement on, and try to pee on a fire hydrant.
Chris: That was in the Osho book. That if the women look at you once they're not interested.
Corky: Oh, I thought you meant he said don't pee on a fire hydrant with a statement on your back.
Chris: He probably said that somewhere too.
Bernie: See, now the book that Cami will end up writing, this is going to be in it!
Corky: Oh god. This is better! This is modern stuff. This chapter is titled "Don't Pee on a Fire Hydrant with a Thing on Your Back."
Su: That'll piqué their interest.
Cami: Can I put a picture of Steve in there, with no tooth?
Bernie: We'll put a before picture and an after picture.
Corky: How would you say that it applies to a female in our society Cami? I always pick on the guys. How would a female avoid? This is not evasion, this is avoidance. So how would you avoid that situation if you were a female, how does it apply?
Cami: That's a tough question because being in a female body is different than being female.
Corky: True. Let's just say, being in a female body and being a feminine person. How would you avoid that? Not evade, avoid. Avoid is legal, evade is illegal.
Cami: Probably by being aware of the traps that you set for yourself.
Corky: Do you think that a female body and a female person can set traps if they want? Do you think that it is wise to do that?
Cami: No, it's not wise. But I think people will do it because they think they're going to gain something from it.
Corky: When you were getting her on your back Steve, were you touching her in a way that you were setting a trap, from your female side?
Steve:I haven't the slightest clue.
Corky: What would you think Bernie? Was he touching her in such a way that his female side was setting a trap for her to be there? Because he wouldn't have lifted his leg if he wasn't setting his trap.
Bernie: Yeah. I mean even though he may not remember now.
Corky: It was an automaton reaction. It was a body without a mind. It was a mind that had been taken control of by its body. The body was in charge right? The body said it wanted this, this and this, so it took charge of Steve. Steve didn't take charge of it. Is that it? The body does it? Now, the female mind does it too sometimes. It thinks about doing it doesn't it Cami? Why? For security?
Cami: Yeah, and for control.
Corky: Power and control. Wow. God just think, if you are in control and you have power, then you gotta take care of it. That is a nightmare; taking care of things. You said Al that it was hard to meditate. It is so hard that it's the easiest thing in the world to do. If you meditate on the easy side; if you fall into it and relax in it, you surrender to it, you give yourself to it, it feels wonderful doesn't it?
Al M:Yeah it does.
Corky: It feels just wonderful when you give yourself to meditation. But most people are in such an argument they cannot give themselves away. And they can't give themselves away because they are wanting something. And so when you want something, you are trying to draw in, rather than give yourself away. It's like guys believe they are giving themselves away when they squirt on the girl, or something like that. That's not true. Doing that is fulfilling their need is all. Do you know what I mean? That is sex. When they want to squirt on somebody. That's sex. When they want to be with, become one with something, that is the state of being. Being with it. Because they are thinking in the past, they have a desire, and they are driven by their body. So when a female mind has sex Cami, it's setting a trap. When a female mind surrenders, it is in bliss right? It's in pain when it's setting a trap isn't it? Because of its cunning. It's the pain of being cunning, rather than a surrender. Do you think there are very many female minds that really surrender? Not in this society is there? Why?
Cami: No. Because, especially in our society, women are brought up to believe a certain thing. And you have to make a name for yourself, and you are just as good as a man, and they can do everything, and you have to prove it.
Corky: Well, there is more to it than that. Get down to the bottom line. That's just the latest excuse.
Cami: I agree. I don't think that people really want to be vulnerable in the way that surrender makes you vulnerable. That they want to expose themselves.
Corky: They want to expose themselves physically, but not their essence.
Cami: Only in the way of control.
Corky: Yeah, they want to expose their physical-ness, but not their essence.
Corky: But that's the same type of female that is a male right? Because male and female bodies have both male and female in them. So there are no girls or boys here tonight, there are just bodies. Everybody who is here has both a boy and a girl. And they use them differently, and they both use them in that way. Guys sometimes throw a tantrum, just like a woman, if they don't get their way. Is that a female thing? A tantrum? It's a female side in the guy or whatever. Little boys and little girls throw tantrums. Does Shekinah throw tantrums?
Corky: Because she is a little girl right? Now if you enforce it she'll continue to do it right? But if you refuse to give it any energy she'll look at it, she'll say "How come they're not buying into this?"
Cami: Yes. It's a tactic to get what she wants.
Corky: So if you guys pay attention to it, she'll build it. If you confront it and say "That makes me sick, don't do that." She'll stop it?
Corky: Okay. Do you think that adults never grow up? They are still doing kid things right?
Cami: Yup. I throw the same tantrums!
Corky: It doesn't matter how old they get. I think really people just before they die throw tantrums, they never get rid of the kid in them. They never get rid of the destiny of their incarnation. Because they don't meditate long enough to break the chain. I think it says that in the Bhagavad Gita. I don't think you could say anything new you guys, sorry I can't come up with anything new. Because I think everybody said it already. But to be able to break the chain, they compare it to a train. I think Patanjali said something like it is a chain, and the Hindus talk about it like a train of thoughts, that it's all connected. And to break it you've got to meditate to be able to transcend it. In such a way that it has to be totally silent. Do you think Shekinah is thinking when she's throwing a tantrum? What is she thinking?
Cami: Yes. She's thinking how she wants things to be different than they are, so she's mad.
Corky: Okay. Stop right there. Did Chris throw a tantrum about the sprinkler with his reply in his email? Did he throw a tantrum about you asking him about the bird bowls Bernie? It was a tantrum right? It was a wordy tantrum. But he does it in emails rather than in public right? He won't throw a tantrum here, because he wants to look controlled, and he wants to look good right? He wouldn't throw a tantrum here because he knows that tantrums don't look good. Right? So he's got to look good. But he'll throw a tantrum in an email when he doesn't think anybody can see him, because he can't help it. It took control of him. Al didn't throw a tantrum. Al just got defensive just a little tiny bit. Hey Al, everybody does it. You are not alone. Fair enough? Everybody does it. Right?
But, it doesn't make any difference. The only person that is better off when you understand it, and you know that you are doing what you are doing, and why you do it, is you. It is no skin off of anybody else's back. It's no benefit for anybody else, well, other people are happier to be around you. But once you drop that part of your propensities, it's sort of like throwing a few rocks out of your backpack of life. Wouldn't you say? If a person were able to do that, drop their tantrums?
Steve may have tantrums and he's pretty good at covering them. Do you think he does Su? Oh, he holds them in and gets doom and gloomy. You are supposed to dance them off. I think Osho said to do a twirling dance, become a twirling dervish. Have you been doing your Yoga Steve? You bad dog, you better get over there to yoga. I mean, before you did that, you were doing it? You need to do aerobics with Bernie. Do you think that would help Bernie?
Bernie: Anything that gets your heart pumping, and cardiovascular system moving like aerobics is great.
Corky: It gets all your dead energy off, and brings you back to life right? But doing an aerobic meditation, you can do it at the yoga center. Do they have whirling dervish dances over there? Tell them to start doing that. It helps if you sweat a little, while you are moving fast. Don't you think Bernie? I took Bernie on a walk in Newport Beach that really got him! You thought it was harder than the aerobics class didn't you?
Bernie: It was. It was a little harder than the kick boxing.
Corky: The incline was rough on that walk. It is an incline to come home at 11:00 in the morning, after working — how many hours Chris, 6 or 8?
Chris: Oh. Um. Three.
Corky: Three hours is all you worked?! What time did you go to work Saturday morning?
Chris: I went in around seven, and I was there until noon today.
Corky: You could have napped for two hours, and then come over and lit the torches. Huh. You don't like inclines?
Chris: Sometimes I like them. Sometimes they make me tired to even think about them.
Corky: Cami, what's Chris saying? His male side doesn't like an incline? Female side is up for an incline right?
Cami: Yeah, the male side doesn't like the incline.
Cami: Being told you are going to go here, you are going to do this. Gotta argue.
Corky: Oh! It's being told something. The male side doesn't like to be told anything. Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! It doesn't like to be told anything? (Laughing hysterically)
It doesn't like to be told anything? Why?
Cami: It's the control and arguing thing.
Corky: It's got a hard on! Why does it have a hard on?
Cami: Because it wants to do its thing to everything. And it doesn't want anything to do it to it. It wants to do everything the hard way.
Al M: It kind of goes back to what you were saying before, about when you say something to the person, rather than, I can't remember how you said it. There's something that you say to that thing which is the material world and there's something that you say that is not of the material world, that causes all the arguments.
Corky: Help us Bernie, what's he saying? One causes argument and the other one surrenders. It all comes back to the same thread. One causes arguments, and one surrenders.
Bernie: One is the peak, and one is the valley.
Steve:One's the hot dog and one is the bun.
Corky: But they become one, how? They surrender to it. How come everybody is doing something out there tonight? You guys aren't doing anything. You ought to be ashamed of yourselves.
Al M: When I was growing up I wanted to be a nobody, which is why I'm here.
Corky: What did that make you think Chris, when he said that? Did it make you believe him?
Chris: I'm trying to think of Al wanting to be a nobody. I knew him as a younger man, and I didn't feel like he wanted to be a nobody. Maybe he's getting more like that now. I'm getting more like that now than I used to. I really wanted to be somebody. I was obsessed with being somebody.
Corky: I think if you are nobody, you are everybody. As long as you are somebody, you are all alone. Right? Because only somebody's can be alone. Because they have to be alone to say they are somebody. But when you are really alone, you are everybody. Does that make sense? Do people become needy for people Bernie?
Bernie: Yes, they do. They become needy. They feel that they've got to have a person for satisfaction.
Corky: Any kind of satisfaction right? This is a weird class, don't you think Cami? It talks about too many personal issues. Doesn't it make you want to knock that guy's weenie off?
Cami: No. Not really.
Corky: Wonder how those guys fit in, these little statues. There's one guy there that's a dog and he's in pretty good shape, and then there is a lady that thinks she is a bull with a sun on her head. I think the only reason that people ever learn anything, is they create koans and metaphors. What they did is they confused the listeners long enough to get them to slow down to listen; I think that's why they made koans. They couldn't figure it out. You can't figure out a koan. Like the sound of one hand clapping. You can't figure it out. It's an experience. You can only experience it. But you can't figure it out in your mind. I think they invented them to get people to stop thinking, and just experience. Just a guess. And metaphors too. So that they were like "What? That doesn't make sense." And they had to stop thinking, and experience it to see what it was, as a metaphor. That story in Thomas with Jesus saying, "You've got to become like a little child." Not stupid like a little child but so innocent that you haven't got a way or a path. Because there is no path. Because there is only one path, which is the no path. And you have to take off all your clothes and get naked, and dance on your clothes like a celebration, like you got everything off of you. All of the backpacks, everything. You gotta just kick it off. Hey, I'm back. Hello! I got all the stuff off. Welcome home. Haven't got any defenses on, long email stories, or reasons why for whatever.
It was unbelievable! Can you believe how chaotic that was last night Bernie? Steve got pretty involved in the chaos. Was that chaotic enough Bernie?
Bernie: Yeah. It was from one chaos to another chaos, to another chaos.
Corky: Wow. That was intense. I thought Jesus! It gave me the itches. Did it give you the itches? It made me itch all over, like I didn't want to be touched by any of it. I tried to get in a discussion position where I could keep a distance from it all. Wow. It was intense. Those young girls are horrible, don't you think?
Corky: Jeeze. What do you think about young girls Cami?
Cami: I've got a lot of friends on that scene and it's frightening.
Corky: Young guys are just as bad jeeze! It is dangerous! I can't believe it. It's not just dangerous for your body; it's dangerous for your essence. Wow. I guess life is on the edge right now, there's getting to be a big change. It is intense. Really weird.
Chris: The hardest thing for me is what you were talking about before: the argument. You were saying men don't surrender because they don't want to give up this desire from the past, this body desire from the past. That's the hardest thing for me.
Corky: Huh. That's okay, I guess.
Su: What will you do in the transference?
Corky: He jumped the Buddha, he said before. Isn't that what he said in class? God, that's dangerous, don't do that in the transference. It's dangerous! Honest. You don't want to do that.
Steve:You might break Buddha's tooth.
Corky: Exactly! Don't do that. Whew! I don't know how you got out of bed this morning Steve. Did you get up when we called and said we were coming, were you in bed then? I thought, if I had that happen to me, I wouldn't get out of bed for about a week!
Steve:I got up about 8, drank some water, and went back to bed. When I got home from here, I went back to bed.
Corky: You're okay though right now? You're going to go home and sleep, go home early tonight? Good boy! Practice dropping out of destiny. It makes everything smoother guys, honest!