January 29, 2005
To identify one's self with being a man or a woman is the first step of your prison.
(Flight of the bumblebee playing)
Corky: I was telling Al, for people that haven't learned to meditate inside, noises on the outside are fine, but if you've learned to meditate inside, you don't really need music. The music's inside, but, you know, some people haven't learned to meditate inside. That's something all the meditators will have to decide.
It was really interesting, Al and I were talking in the bottleing building just a few minutes ago. But before I wanted to mention anything about that I wanted to say it's so funny how Osho contradicts himself so many times, and I guess it's because of the divine paradox. In a book before, or in this book, he was saying that a man needs to be with lots of different women. And in this book, last week, he said no no, you don't want to be with a lot of different women. He contradicted himself. But what he was saying was that if a man is just doing sex he wants to be with a lot of different women. But if he's finding his essence, if he's awakening, woman or a man, that they don't want to do that. The reason being is that they don't have enough time to awaken the person inside. And I wanted to read a little section out of what he had to say this last week, but I thought it was really interesting. Did anyone catch that, how he said that you need to be with lots of women and this last week he said no no you don't want to do that because all you do is you get hooked on changing all the time.
Al G: Well that's a common denominator with mystics, they tend to contradict.
Donna: But he's also answering questions for different people and different people need different things.
Corky: And different situations. And he may be answering a question at one time for a bunch of neophytes that just showed up. And says oh yeah, be with a lot of different women and get it all over with and once you get it all over with then come back and then I will talk to you about finding the woman within you and the man within you and that the man on the outside can join with the woman on the inside and awaken themselves in that aloneness and they can join together and become one. And then he sort of said in this passage, I would sort of call it a passage like in a bible, and Osho does it in a very interesting way, he very gently slides in the issue. And then it just rests with people until they get to a point where they get confronted with it in life. But he slides the issue in... because he had a lot of people that were gathered around, and most people that come around here get pissed off right away or after a while for some reason or another, something that I do or say bothers them so much that they never come back or it makes them angry because it touches them in a very tender point that they are having a difficult time with. And instead of looking at it they just get mad and go away and try to ignore it.
In the old days I used to change the condition of the universe. And I did it because that was the way that the destiny was to start Summum out. And in changing the condition of the universe, just like it says throughout history, it doesn't make any difference. You can do it all you want, but it doesn't change anybody else's mind, they either get mad and go away or they deny that it ever happened.
Ron, you were there with Jan Fabian in the parking lot when there wasn't a cloud in the sky and Jan Fabian said make it rain, right? And it rained, right? But didn't Jan Fabian deny that it rained. As she was leaving, she said "no it didn't rain" in her mind.
Ron: Oh yeah.
Corky: Did it rain?
Corky: But there were no clouds right? But she asked for it to rain and so I made it rain and then when it did rain you could see it hitting on the ground. Was it real rain or do you think it was an imaginary rain?
Ron: Oh yeah, it was real rain. It was real rain for a while but then when she left she denied it.
Corky: And so it doesn't do any good to change the condition of the universe or anything like that because the people that you do it for, or you do it with deny it unless they are ready for it. That was just a tiny change. And the book in here, Osho's book, talks about joining your inner male with your inner female and then becoming one. And what would you say would happen Shad if your inner male and your inner female became one?
Shad: I don't know how to answer, I don't know..
Corky: What do you think would happen Chris, in physics what do you think would happen if a neutron and a proton joined together and became one?
Chris: You would create something new.
Corky: You would create something new, and what happens when those things join together? Usually they become neutral temporarily and then they bond with something identical and they become larger. Because they're neutral, they've fallen into everything that's neutral, they become neutral with all the nothing neutralness. They become part of it.
Chris: Yeah, but to bond with something else there has to be some attraction.
Corky: Well, there has to be an attraction and the attraction is that there is a similar state. And in the similar state they rise up, they do maybe have an opposite, but in the neutral state they join together. It's like the ocean. It's like all the drops to make a glass of water. How many drops of water in one 8 oz glass of water Cami?
Corky: Millions? How many atoms are in an 8 oz glass of water Steve?
Steve: 8 Trillion.
Corky: 8 trillion probably. But how did we get a glass of water in the first place Shad? What had to happen?
Shad: You had to turn on the fausett.
Corky: You had to turn on the fausett, or you had to hold your cup out while it was raining. And what fell in? Water. Did it fall in as a stream as it falls out of the sky? It fell in as drops, right? Such a beautiful example this is. Next time it rains you guys, and it's going to rain a lot this spring, I want you to watch it as it comes down out of the sky. I want you to watch and see how closely you can watch a drop as it comes out of the sky and just before it hits a puddle of water and I want you to observe it very very very closely, and I want you to tell me what happens to the drop just before it hits the pool. And what happens as it hits the pool, and what happens after it hits the pool. Has anybody ever watched that happen? Have you ever watched the rain fall like that, have you ever followed the drops down?
Cami: I've only been able to follow it on a window pane or something like that?
Corky: Have you ever watched them through the sky Shad? Watched them hit the pool?
Shad: Yeah, I have.
Corky: It's fun isn't it?
Shad: Yeah, it is.
Corky: So I want everybody to take an opportunity to watch the different kinds of drops that come out of the sky and how they land in the puddles of water and what they do in the puddles of water and where the water goes, and where they came from and how they got there.
Remember that nurse that came here named Pam, was her name Pam? No, that pharmacist. Was her name Pam?
Donna: I don't remember.
Corky: She was a pharmacist and she worked for smiths in the pharmacy. And she had an education, she wasn't stupid. I mean she knew about electrons and protons and a little bit of chemistry and pharmacy and stuff like that, and she knew about birth control and IUD's and she knew about all of those and she had those but she didn't have a boyfriend but she was preparing to have a boyfriend. And so she was using both of them and she came to class and there were a bunch of people that were coming to class then right? Remember Donna? And she was sitting over here on this side of the class before we had the furniture and everything and we had the vat off to the side and we would all sit on the floor back in the old days right? And I used to change the condition of the universe and it was sort of funny, but it wasn't really funny. At the same time what I would do is I would give the women, the inner women, an inner orgasm, not an exterior orgasm, but some of them did have exterior orgasms because of the inner orgasms. And then a couple of times I said I was going to make you pregnant, and I made them pregnant, and Pam got pregnant. And she was the pharmacist with the IUD and the birth control pills without the boyfriend and hadn't been having sex and she had to have an abortion and she never came back to class, but she got real mad about it remember? Were you here when she got mad about it? She came pounding on the doors really mad about being pregnant and that how could that happen to her here and stuff like that. But she never came back because it frightened her so much.
You got pregnant didn't you from that time Donna? Were you on birth control?
Corky: Oh you weren't huh? She was on birth control. Doesn't make any difference if you take birth control when the condition of the universe changes. But it didn't do any good, all it did was chase Pam away, and it didn't do any good with Donna because Donna went away later, right Donna? It didn't do any good did it?
Donna: Well, you don't know that it didn't do any good.
Corky: Well, I know but it may have made an interchange but it didn't really change the universe in a permanent way to do anything like that. Except for maybe in a little way in your way and her way, but not for everybody else, because Ron didn't care and he was here when it rained in the parking lot.
And Al and I were talking in the building and Al said he came here first in what year? Nineteen... .
Al M. : 21 I think.
Corky: You probably did in a previous life. And he said that just recently that he discovered within himself that he trusted himself well enough to be able to hear what was happening. He decided to trust himself well enough to have enough confidence, enough love for himself to allow himself to really know what was happening. That's a great bridge isn't it? Don't you think it's everybody's personal bridge? It doesn't have anything to do with what happens here, it has to do with everybody, it's their personal thing. Doesn't matter where they go, till they trust themselves well enough.
Osho has, it says in the koan of relationships, he has this really interesting statement this last week. It says "The real orgasm happens inside you, when your inner man and woman meet." It has nothing to do with anybody outside. "This is the meaning of the Hindu symbolism of Adwadawashahaha. You must have seen the statue of shiva as half man half woman. Each man is half man, half woman, each woman is half woman, half man. It has to be so because half of your being comes from your father and half of your being comes from your mother, you are both."
To identify one's self with being a man or a woman is the first step of your prison. It's the first three steps forward and then you make two back. It's the first obstacle you create. A young child, a baby doesn't know whether it's a girl or a boy until you tell it that it is one or the other. This is one of the things that lesbians and gays try to tell everybody in the world that hey, all this time I've been told that I was a boy and I'm really a woman, or all this time I'm being told I'm a woman and I'm really a man. Or all this time I've been told I'm one or the other and I'm neither one of those at all, I'm nothing, I'm both. But society and the parent s begin when your very very young and they say this is what you are because this is what you look like.
It's very interesting, in the hospitals today there are children that are born that are asexual, they are neither a man or a woman, they have both and the parents are required to decide what they would like them to be. And so they usually do the easiest operation depending upon the condition of the baby when it's born, whether their ovaries are close to the outside so they can make the testicles and make the clitoris into a weenie or make the weenie into a clitoris and put the testicles inside and have room for a uterus to develop. In fact I think even some of that surgery takes place inside the womb, on babies. Now they're doing internal surgery inside the womb with an endoscope that goes inside.
And it goes on to say "An inner orgasm, an inner meeting, an inner union is needed." He didn't say that an inner orgasm or an inner union, or an inner meeting would be fun. He didn't say it would be a holiday, didn't say it would be a celebration, didn't say it would be a party, didn't say it would be the last supper, didn't say it would be the beginning of a new universe. He said it was needed. What does needed mean Bernie?
Bernie: Well I guess it depends on the context, but required?
Corky: A requirement. That's an odd thing to say isn't it? He's not talking about an exterior orgasm where if you're a man you do a squirting or if you're a woman you do a squealing like they do on the tv or on pornography films or whatever. "An inner orgasm, an inner meeting, an inner union is needed." He didn't say that it would be nice, didn't say it would be fun, it's a necessary element. It's a necessary thing that has to happen. "But to reach that inner union you have to find a woman outside who responds to the inner woman who vibrates your inner being, your inner woman, who is lying fast asleep and awakes." He's telling you Shad that your woman inside has got to find a woman on the outside, didn't say your man, he said your woman.
Steve: Your inner lesbian.
Corky: Well, I wouldn't necessarily call it a lesbian because a lesbian is an exterior thing. He's talking here about the inner being. "Through the outer woman you have to meet the inner woman and the same for men. So if the relationship continues for a long period it will be better because the inner woman needs time to be awakened. As it is happening in the west, hit and run affairs, the inner woman, the inner man has no time to rise and become awakened. By the time there is a stirring, the woman is gone. Another woman, another vibration. And of course if you go on changing your woman and your man you become neurotic because so many things, so many sounds will enter your being."
And of course if you go on changing your woman and your man you become neurotic because so many things, so many sounds or vibrations will enter into your being and so many different qualities of vibrations that you will be at a loss to find your inner woman and it will be difficult. "And the possibility is that you may become an addict to change, and you will just start enjoying change, then your lost."
Why is Osho saying you gotta find your inner woman Al M.? Why would he say that you gotta find your inner woman?
Al M.: Because it's a male world.
Corky: That's part of it, but what is there special about your inner woman Shad? What does it do differently than your inner man?
Shad: It listens.
Corky: It listens! You know what, they have subtle schools of listening for woman in the churches. They say that the man is supposed to be the master of the house and stuff like that and they're supposed to tell the woman what to do and stuff like that. It doesn't work, because as soon as you start telling the woman what to do she becomes a man. And that is why the world has become so weird. Because you cant tell a woman anything can you? The woman has to listen. It's sort of like, what's the difference between the sperm and the egg Steve?
Steve: The genetic code within it.
Corky: Ok, whats the difference in their activity?
Steve: One is waiting and one is searching.
Corky: One is wanting and one is what?
Steve: One is waiting
Corky: and one is wanting. It's wanting and searching for what?
Steve: For contact.
Corky: No, for penetration. It's wanting for penetration.
Steve: Your so graphic.
Corky: Sorry, the truth is graphic. For penetration, as above so below, it's the same thing. One is with and one is without. Your inner woman is asleep, doesn't make any difference if you have a man's body or a girls body guys now, keep this in mind Pilar. Doesn't make any difference if you've got a mans body or a girls body. Your inner woman is asleep in most everyone. Except for a very very very few in the first chapter of the Kybalion. Very few. Osho said you could count them on one hand didn't he? Maybe two hands in each generation. I think Buddha said the same thing, Krisha said the same thing, Vishnu said the same thing. Shiva, that was a woman, said the same thing. Very very few humankind at the level of the humankind consciousness ever awaken their woman inside. The reason being is because their attention is outside all the time. And it doesn't mean just to turn your attention inside and meditate, there's more to it than that. As Steve just said, the sperm is on a mission. It's trying to convert something to it's way. And the egg is in the state of being, it already is. You cannot take a sperm and add something to it and make a baby. You can take an egg and take everything out of it and put the leaf genetics inside of it and a leaf will be born. You can take a human egg, take the genetics out of it, female egg, and put a cow... little big, how about a cats genetics inside of it and a cat will be born. It's in waiting. It's in the state of being, it is already, it's complete, it's there. But those are the things that are just awake. Because those are on the lower level of the genetics of bodies, but the woman, the egg woman within everybody Is usually asleep. It's asleep waiting to be awakened. But Osho said it took another woman to awaken it. Didn't he? Did he say it took a man to awaken it?
Shad: You said woman, that's what you read out of there.
Corky: I didn't make it up. He said it. Jesus said the same thing. Takes another woman to awaken it. And that's why Osho said he was feminine. That's why Osho said you need to become feminine before you can be awakened. It's a need, it's a requirement, it's a necessity, it's an obligation, it's a responsibility, it is a destiny, it is a must. Before you can awaken yourself. Because only an egg can surrender, sperm cant, it's on a mission. Predestined mission, right? And does the egg surrender?
Corky: What does the egg surrender to? Penetration?
Steve: The right sperm.
Corky: Yeah. And then it's awakened right, and then creation takes place. But the awakening happened inside of the egg, it didn't happen inside of the sperm. The sperm may have been the trigger to awaken it, the paradox may have been that it took the sperm to do it, but it doesn't really take the sperm any longer. You can take an egg and just add genetics to it and it will give birth. You don't need a sperm any longer. You can do away with men totally in today's science, and that's what scares religion.
You need to find a woman to awaken your inner woman. How could Osho say that? That's really sad for women out there looking for a man, they gotta be awakened. They gotta find a woman. You know what kind of woman I'm talking about, right? It's like all those drops of water that your gonna watch fall into the puddle becoming one with it. And I want you to watch them from as high as you can see them, follow them down and see what happens to them just before they touch how they change. Just before they touch they change.
Lets take a break and come right back?